1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My feet surprised me
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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