That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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