I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize