Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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