My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
