That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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