Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
40s are totally the cure
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Randomize