The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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