I intend to get homeless drunk
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
