Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
