D3 body, D1 cock
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
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It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
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He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news