I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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