i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
