This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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