I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.