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Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
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