why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
im six kinds of drunk right now
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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