My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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