just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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