Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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