it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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