I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize