Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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