Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
