im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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