What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
