im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Randomize
