Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
