she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize