Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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