I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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