Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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