an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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