Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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