Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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