I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
