We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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