I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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