conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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