i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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