when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
