How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
