i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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