sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
