I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.