had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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