My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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