That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
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The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
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We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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