sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
