well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize