Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
