It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
