I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
